I just got back from a much needed vacation. The wife and I usually go outside the States but this recession is a mutha so we decided to go somewhere we would blend in easily—Miami. Plus we have good friends down there: my homie Jerome and her BFF Adriana. The one night I decide to drink and get buzzed I end up saying something offensive or so they tell me. It was Adri, Priscilla (my wife’s Cali BFF), Oz (Pris’ hubby and a Marine; salute ya bastids), and Adri’s bf Jerry. Along with them were two of Adri’s new Miami amigas; one of them was a Caucasian and once I threw back an Irish car bomb I quickly reminded her of it.
You see, her blanquita friend took salsa dancing classes. I was intrigued to find out why she was attracted to our culture. Jerry chimed in and said it was because of all the Latin man meat, pause, in Miami. I do remember asking her the aforementioned question but not being offensive. The next day driving to a mall, Adri scolds me like her stepchild. She tells me that I shouldn’t have grilled her friend because I just met her. As sweat trickled down my cheeks (on my face) I was a little taken aback but I stood my ground. She then felt bad and offered me a water bottle with dirt on it. I rejected it and she called me an asshole (back to normal). She did make me think that I do say things, at times, that make my wife crawl under a table. I just can’t fake the funk; if you’re an asshole, pause, chances are I won’t talk to you. Plus some of my best friends are blancos! (Right, Jerome?)
Uno,
Jesus
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